Everything is different...

I have not blogged in some time.....Partly because life has changed so much, partly due to crazy schedules, and partly because it was hard to write. Jason and I have been divorced for a little over a year now....life has changed, for all of us. I never wanted to divorce, in fact, I fought like hell to keep it from happening, but sometimes life does not give us the happily ever after we are all hoping for. I have come to realize that there are so many elements involved in the happily ever after. Some of those elements are out of our control and others are in our control by the choices that we make. Sometimes we have to let go of what we thought was "supposed to be" and rewrite our lives the way we are guided to rewrite them. I am still figuring that out...... We were so excited to move to Sandpoint, so it was heartbreaking to leave.....but the job market in a that little city, was not happening. The boys and I moved to Nampa, Idaho where we live now. The boys are adjusting and so am I. I work as a Habilitative Interventionist at a developmental center and I am still working on my dissertation for my doctoral program. Jason moved back to Utah, and has found a good job as well. I felt compelled to write again....maybe because I am at a point where I feel as if I am crossing over a bridge and ready to start the healing process, maybe I need to vent, or maybe I just want to write again....I am not sure what actually has motivated me to start my blog again, but here I am....with all raw emotions into play. I have had several jobs since moving here, each time I start a new job it is an upgrade from the last.....It has been a learning experience as to what I DO NOT want to do as a career, and what I love doing. The boys are doing great. Eli has a great daycare/preschool with awesome teachers, and Max's school is amazing and I love the teachers and the school. The boys are doing well even though they miss their Dad often. Jason and I are still working out kinks on when the kids can visit and schedules. I am excited to be back....and whatever our happily ever after will be. One thing I know for sure, I love my boys, and I will always do my best for them.